I need to curb my pinterest addiction though or very little will be done to the place (if you’re interested in seeing the kind of things I’ve collected then check out http://pinterest.com/rosevibe/ some lovely things there – if you want an invite let me know) the problem is I’m lacking focus; I need a job, a set of aims and objectives – something with an externally imposed deadline.

That’s right, a deadline.

I know I whined about ‘em all through uni but the truth is that f I don’t have a set deadline I flounder and bimble and just collect ideas for things to do ‘someday’ but someday never comes. There is no urgency to the things I want to do for myself; unless it is for another person I let life get in the way and put things off because they’re not really important.

If we owned our own home then it might be different; I could make that my focus and actually do some of the things I’ve earmarked to make life a little easier and utilise the space we have to it’s best advantage – but when you rent a place it’s not so easy to change things, especially when you know it will cost you money in the long run as you have to put it all back the way it was when you move.

Instead I’m fumbling around in a kind of limbo and I hate it; I hate lacking purpose; always have.

I have too many interests and no NEED to focus on any or to choose a favourite, unless I’m doing something for somebody else and have that fear of letting them down to spur me on I’ll continue to make lists, collect tutorials and read about the things I should be doing.

This week has been nice as I’ve had a small job to do, my former tutor had me editing a 3 minute elevator pitch video for some project funding; it was a tight deadline but to be honest, I prefer that; I need that slight feeling of pressure to get the juices flowing. I just wish I hadn’t had a couple of CFS days to deal with in the middle of it or I would feel like I’d done a better job.

..Then again, it wasn’t a bad job; just not up to my perfectionist aspirations, I can always see where I could have done better; still not quite down with the ‘just good enough’ mentality necessary to get things moving.

That’s probably my greatest weakness; I need somebody else to say “stop, it’ll do as it is” because left to myself I’ll be tweaking forever in order to make whatever it is match the perfect result I envision in my head and nobody else will ever see my creation because it “isn’t ready/ it’s not good enough”

So realistically – even if I do ‘get the chance’ to work on it, this website will likely always be as is; my test site still isn’t shiny enough.. One day I’ll find confidence in my abilities and stop comparing myself to people who for years have been doing the things for a living that I’m just learning; but not today.

Today I have to create some pdf’s for another uni contact and play around with wordpress to do so – they want a basic users guide so, screenshots a-plenty. ..And I might venture out into the sunshine for a dose of vitamin D when I’m sick of doing that

..Staying away from pinterest – it’s a worse time sink than stumbleupon!

Then there’s the little things like dodgy net connection, exceeding our bandwidth allowance (thanks netflix!) general motherhood and oh yes, the latest effort real life is making to claw me back from the virtual; my smartphone broke *sob*

I am now back to discovering how much I enjoyed using my MDA Vario (HTC Wizard) the battery lasts THREE DAYS! it has built in calendar and task lists, my old ring tone ( the ‘oohhwa-ah-ah-ah’ bit from the start of Down with the sickness by Disturbed) which annoys my other half no end *grin* It’s a damned good phone.

Sadly it’s not an Android phone. I had to manually update all my contacts and my calendar, I’ve lost all my CFS crash data for the last 2 months (thankfully had backed up in December otherwise it would be 2 years data lost) I can’t access twitter easily any more as I only have wifi and on the MDA it is dodgy at best plus the browser is an old version of IE which doesn’t help matters much. The camera is useless and I can’t put any apps on it *sniff* that’s the worst thing about this phone; I’ve been spoiled, was so used to having everything at my fingers that now I’ve downgraded I’m really missing my apps – especially the bar code scanner for the calorie counting, and my period tracker (so reliant on it that I don’t know my dates now!) I also didn’t realise how often I accessed the TV guide app until I couldn’t do so anymore.

..And please don’t mention twitter – it’s like I’ve lost a limb.

Maybe it’ll bring me back to ‘real’ blogging though, and maybe something will come up that will allow me to pay for this site to continue – like getting off my backside and selling some jewellery or something. Either way, things are changing in my life, boundaries are shifting and I’m once again re-assessing where I want to go and what I want to do.

Ideally someone will employ me soon – even if it’s just for enough hours a week to pay me the £97.50 I’m allowed to earn on top of my benefits; that’d pay for my website and beads and a little left over for bellas trust fund each month. To be honest it’s all I really need in life to keep me going; everyone needs a hobby or two and having money abouve your outgoings.. well! It’s the dream isn’t it?! (Now if someone would pay me full time wages for a part time job I’d be able to get a nice 3-bed house with garden and that would make me incandescent with joy, room to craft properly; my very own dream come true!)

It’s a decision made because currently this is a self-indulgent hobby site that serves no real purpose. Initially I bought the domain and hosting because I wanted to further my knowledge of web design and this was to be my playground. Well it served its purpose admirably in that regard but now I know enough about the web that I’d be best served playing on the development environment I have set up offline; having a blog on my own domain is nice but unnecessary, I am NOT a ‘brand’ or business and so until that becomes the case I’m better off reverting to an interface that requires no financial outlay. ..and on the plus side it also means I can have a truly private journal again.

Why is a private journal such a plus..? Well, I used to write as a means of blowing off steam, it was cathartic and helped me to cope with stress and worry as well as to sort out in my own mind the things that were truly bothering me – as soon as I put all of those thoughts on the web and allowed people access to it I had to censor what I write, the more I learned about the web the more I censored – I even deleted several posts in an effort to ‘spin’ my ‘image’ (stupid as I think the wayback machine has everything cached but heyho, you can have a looksee if you really want to..)

Yes, I know I could create a private journal and keep the public one but that’s hassle, why not just have one journal and use category tags to separate the content?  That way if I do upload my blatherings in the future I can just remove the private stuff and have all my education, social media, web and jewellery musings available for those of you inclined to read it.

So.. rosevibe.me.uk has served me well but it’s time to let it go, I shall be backing everything up and getting things shipshape as i’m 90% decided to do this even if one or both of us do gain employment before the June deadline: If I do create a website for myself in future it will be under a different domain using my own name and not the username I’ve had for so many years (probably).

There was a slight twinge at the thought of giving up the google juice I’ve garnered through this blog but a search on 3 different search engines shows that “vicky stringer” will likely still have me in the top three if not the coveted top spot in the UK listings (and in one case global listings) with my linkedin and twitter profiles – although that may also change once the links to this blog are removed; but even that’s not a bad thing.

As I said before I’m not a brand or a business, I’m just an individual with nothing to sell; let the coveted top spot go to someone who really wants and needs it and let me fade into some of the less checked results until such time as I choose to do something more productive with my ‘skills’.

Saving money and using resources responsibly is the name of the game for 2012 as far as I’m concerned; this is my first step. I’m getting my virtual house in order and downsizing; what are you doing..?

Sorry? Did I say ‘nailed’?

You’re damn right I did; 1st class honours baby, read it and weep at my brilliance!.

Being a direct entrant to the final year of this course at the University of Hertfordshire meant that unlike most of my fellow students who had enrolled in the first year, my final grade was dependant purely upon the work completed in this year; no prior grades to depend on as a backup for any failed module. (So no pressure eh?!)

I had to defer all my semester B modules because of the ME/CFS issues and this resulted in half my grades being in alphanumeric format (semester a modules) and the new numerical format the university had switched to during  the gap between my initial semester B and the retake semester B

As the table below shows – anything with a numeric grade of 80 or above is deemed ‘outstanding’ BUT, as you’ll see from my DES grade,  an A1 which is the highest possible alphanumeric grade available, is only worth 78 numerically – how someone is supposed to achieve an ‘outstanding’ is beyond me; still, guess I can live with an overall descriptor of ‘Excellent’ *grin*

The degree in question is Bsc Information Technology (web based systems) and it comprised of several modules:

Professional Issues in Computing – Core module
This 3 hour exam showed that I have learned:

• To understand the standards expected of a computing professional, and the responsibilities that these place on those occupying these roles;
• To appreciate the legal, professional and ethical issues that can arise during the course of the work of a computing professional; and have an understanding of the impact of computer-based systems on their stakeholders, and on society in general.
•  To be able to recognise legal, professional and ethical issues in the context of professional computing practice, and deal with them appropriately;
•  To be able to articulate a well-informed, up-to-date opinion on legal, professional and ethical issues in the context of interactions with, for example, colleagues in professional computing practice and non-technical colleagues.

Grade achieved: 72 (converted from A3)

Digital Entertainment Systems (Digital Media Production) – Optional module

The required coursework showed that I;

• Understand issues in the development, design, implementation and evaluation of high quality digital media;
• Understand the wider context of digital media, for example culture, research and future trends in digital media, for example audio and video formats;
• Understand usability and Human Computer Interaction as it applies to the development of interactive multimedia systems;
• Developed the range of skills required in order to produce digital media.
•  Demonstrated professional competence in areas such as image, animation, video and audio production and editing;
• Developed scripting and programming skills in order to create interactive digital media systems

Grade achieved: 78 (Converted from A1) <– felt so cheated that I got the highest possible alphanumeric grade and in the conversion it wasn’t even an 80! I was quite gutted to see it drop like that.

Principles and Applications of Web Services (technology) – Core module

The 3 hour exam showed that I have learned to

• Understand the different components of typical web service architectures including data representations, messaging protocols and service description based on XML
• Understand the different approaches to implementing web services across a range of application such as mash-ups and enterprise services
• Generate requests to a web service using appropriately formatted requests, and process or display the returned XML data
• Create a web service using appropriate standards, protocols and tools to enable third parties to access particular data or functionality

Grade achieved: 72 (converted from A3)

Principles and Applications of Web Services (architecture) – Core module

Another 3 hour exam which demonstrated my knowledge of

• Different approaches to web service architecture including mash-ups, RESTful services, and Enterprise Web Services;
• The role of XML standards in developing service oriented architectures such as XML Schemas, BPEL, and WS Policy/Addressing/Security.
• How to use XML schemas and data in the specification and configuration of web services;
• How to evaluate the applicability of different web service architectures in a given situation.

Grade achieved: 71

Web Application Development (Design) – Core module
The 2 hour exam and additional coursework portfolio showed that I have learned

• To understand and explain the importance of separating style from content;
• To discuss principles and practices of good web site design and the standards that web design should comply with.
• To participate in the planning, design and development of a web site, selecting suitable tools and technologies for the task;
• To evaluate and improve existing web designs to make them more accessible or effective.

Grade achieved: 72 (converted from A3)

Web Application Development (enhancement) – Core module
This was another 3 hour exam which showed that I’ve learned

• To describe the document object model;
• To discuss the capabilities and pitfalls of using client side scripting in web sites.
• To create or interpret state charts of the interface;
• To add client side scripting to web sites using standards compliant instructions;
• To incorporate visual or time-based media to a web site that does not affect the function or accessibility of the site.

Grade achieved: 69

Web Based Systems Project – Core module
This is the one all the lovely folk in my social networks got sick of hearing about – but I really owe the folk of the web for getting me through it, random questions answered, emotional support and the odd kick up the virtual behind meant that the coursework I submitted and the website I demonstrated proved that I had learned to:

1. Understand a coherent set of Information Technology principles and techniques appropriate to the solution of a practical problem that involves the development, deployment, or management of a Web-Based System;
2. Appreciate when and how to apply those principles and techniques to the solution of problems in Web-Based Systems.
3. Select and resolve a substantial practical task which requires applied knowledge of Information Technology in the context of a Web-Based Systems problem;
4. Plan and conduct a programme of practical work independently of close supervision;
5. Select and apply an appropriate set of criteria against which their own project work and the work of others may be evaluated;
6. Document, report on, and critically evaluate  work in a manner appropriate to the needs of a specified readership.

So, that’s how I got my degree, by learning a lot of rather interesting and hopefully useful ‘stuff’, it involved a lot of hair pulling, several late nights and relapse inducing cram sessions, So I also know how far I can push myself mentally before things go south on the health front.

No, there was very little programming and coding involved in this last year aside from the tweaking to templates and scripts conducted as part of my project; but I have the basic knowledge needed to go away and teach myself how to do all the fancy stuff.

The main thing this course has taught me is what I am not. I am not a web designer, nor am I a web developer; I am a knowledgeable client or at best a hobbyist. But you know what? That’s ok. I don’t really want to be either of those things anyway, I discovered my love of e-learning during this academic journey, I know how to create reusable learning objects, what tools and techniques to use to aid students with their studies and how to explain what is needed to the REAL techies and creatives out there with either a crude prototype or the necessary models.

I can liaise between geeks and normals with ease in a work environment and find the solution to a problem even if I can’t fully implement it myself (yet) I can write reports well, keep (mostly) to deadlines and GET THE JOB DONE – despite health and home issues.

Basically, I ROCK!

So I’m going to stop beating myself up over the job search issue and give myself a well earned break until Bella goes full time to nursery in January, then I should be able to manage 20hrs a week (travel dependent) in some FE/HE institute working on anything to aid in the creation of an inclusive blended learning environment.

But the mental challenge of a job would be preferable. Yes, I know I’m stuck looking for part-time but part-time work in an interesting job is better than full time incapacity benefit stuck at home where my only interaction with the outside world is via twitter! (even if it doesn’t pay as much)

I do have a few personal challenges that are admittedly more ‘aim’ than ‘objective’;

1. Create a wordpress e-learning theme that is scorm compliant and at least attempts to be WCAG AAA compliant
2. Write a few nettuts that are payment worthy.
3. Create some fantastic geek jewellery.
4. Create some beautiful ‘normal’ jewellery.
5. Learn more about moodle and blackboard
6. Create my symptom tracker web app
7. Find someone to consider my web taxonomy ideas (a whole other post)
8. Learn to use all available google tools
9. Write an academic research paper fit for publishing
10. Learn to drive (actually this one IS an objective)
11. (just for @lesleyconner and my dad) write a book/ story

And then there’s the ‘none work’ stuff I want to do with my family and friends;

1. Teach bella to read
2. Go on holiday to centerparcs
3. Go and visit friends abroad
4. Take bella to a sandy beach, make a sandcastle and bury stefanio (purely for the photo op)
5. Family photo shoot
6. REGULAR Karaoke with Claire
7. Write some songs with Claire
8. Have a mass gathering of geeks with kids somewhere with a bouncy castle and a wide open space for running games.
9. Visit an aquarium, science and ‘normal’ museums with bella
10. Have a ‘dirty weekend’ spa break with stef.

Hmm.. notice how all the family and friend stuff costs money but most of the work stuff is free? Guess I need that job first after all *grin*

Who wants to pay me good money to do the stuff in the first list? Feel free to contact me; i’m now open to offers ;o)